Category Archives: people

Overcoming Anxieties, Depression, “the Bad Feelings”

spacial_spirals_tilesThere’s so much back story that people have. From terrible childhoods, horrid relationships, physical, and mental abuse, to our own personal internal demons.

Each of our histories are different, but the fundamental outcomes are similar.

There aren’t necessarily easy answers to every problem, but the resulting feelings, the anxieties, depression, worries, energy and stress, can be treatable and resolvable.

There used to be a quip that was meant to be funny, but there’s a true gem within it.

Whenever you come to a fork in the road, take it.” Sounds like just a clever way of wording, but there’s “gold in those hills.”

Allow me a little more time to explain. Most of us with tendencies toward very common occurrences, anxiety, depression, overt sensitivities, may be able to trace the starting point or the events in our lives. We can remember a time, place, event, or person which caused us pain.

Do you want to continue to live with that distress? Do you believe all is lost, there’s just no hope? I’m here to tell you, I’ve walked, talked, and lived in those shoes.

Do you really want to shed those problems and live a life that you can only imagine? I offer this advice as a starting point. A way to overcome virtually everything that’s troubling you.

I’m not a trained professional, or a doctor of any psychiatry or psychology profession. What I can offer is a way out, no payments or money requested. No adoration or manipulation. No promises or miracles. I simply will explain what has helped. You must be absolutely committed to achieving this success. I can’t do a thing that will help you, if you simply find yourself doing nothing but being critical of what I write.

This isn’t going to be a take this pill or magic herb, do all these things, and you will be cured, it’s just going to be practical tips to improve your well being. Your outcome isn’t guaranteed. Just don’t accept this advise without seeking professional guidance. If you’re spiraling downward, getting into scrapes with the law, then don’t follow this advice if you have any reason to believe it’s harmful.

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No rainbows & unicorns or magic

This won’t be a rainbows & unicorns set of posts. I’m offering nothing more than what I’ve learned. If there’s any worsening of your present condition, suicidal thoughts, or self-harm emotional disposition with what you’re reading and following from my advise, cease immediately and seek professional consultation help. No self-identification, please. If you respond, anonymize who you are for your safety. Sharing should be allowed but guard your privacy.

The Beginning of Feeling Better

So, let’s go back to the quip, because it holds the first key, in a series of things you must do to feel better. “when you come to that fork, take it.” That suggests you must move forward. How do I do that when I feel this way or have these problems?

You have several choices as long as you’re alive.LP-record-image

  1.  stay the same
  2.  relive the past
  3.  move forward a step at a time

History of any type, personal, or that of a group, can teach us something but it shouldn’t be constantly relived. The definition of insanity is described as doing the same thing, the same way, but expecting different results. The cycle must be broken. Live with your self in the present, don’t regurgitate those painful moments. That’s personal torture. It’s why so many of us have deep seated emotional problems. Just as an athlete becomes stronger, and more skilled with repetition, if we continue to re-live those negative moments, we’re enabling and strengthening the hold they have on us.

To step forward to a brighter and happier future, we must remember this one maxim. Living in the past is a country that we’ve seen, no longer have a visa, and we’re denied reentering.

That’s the starting point. I’m going to continue writing on this topic if I receive positive feedback. There’s much more to say and even more to do.

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A Bright Side of Time

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Heathrow tube

I traveled far from home last November. I boarded a plane in the US, destination UK. After 6+ years of online communication between myself and a woman in the UK, I thought I had found love. In about a month after my arrival, I became yesterday’s news.

I was smitten, and she was infatuated. She wanted to be in love,
and she believed she was in love with me. It turns out the single life for her seems better, for now

She discovered I wasn’t her ideal companion. Those feelings were further amplified by her discussions with her sister. Her sister then determined to set things right by reading me the riot act.

Fortunately her mom & dad didn’t behave in the same
boorish manner and we had a lovely dinner a few times together, as well as a wonderful walk in a botanical garden.

I left the UK in January just before the COVID-19 pandemic.

Recent communication between her and myself became strained. Her last text said she was annoyed with
my frequency of texts. Thus the circle is complete. What started out simple, became complex, now I’m returning to simple.

I’m going down my own path, far from the confusion of what someone else may think of me. I learned some things and I wish her well. She’s a very nice person.

A Time To Lead

America has seen crises come and go, but this time is different. There’s a chasm of leadership with seemingly no political party that has an answer. The Democrats have actually done a disservice to the minorities of this country. They’ve pandered to them as a voting bloc, but have systematically assisted in the breakdown of families and educational programs.

When we look toward the Republican party their answer has been tilted more towards meeting civil unrest with adequate law enforcement and crowd suppression.  Neither of them seem to be connected to how or why we got here.

George Will in one of his latest Washington Post opinions excoriated Donald Trump as well as the Republican party. He goes on to admit that racism,  bigotry and social tension existed before Trump took office, and will continue long afterwards.

Nonetheless, he goes on to state, we need a voters purge of Congressional Republicans this November.

If that option was chosen, what are we left with at the ballot box? Do the Democrats have an answer to these and other real problems, such as the pandemic? The Democrats in Congress, seeming only purpose as expressed by House Speaker Nancy Pelosi, are to vote out Republicans and replace them with sycophant Democrats. That’s not a solution but simply another change of deck chairs on a sinking ship.

Michael Jordan-

I don’t have the answers, but our collective voices show strength and the inability to be divided by others,” Jordan said. “We must listen to each other, show compassion and empathy and never turn our backs on senseless brutality. We need to continue peaceful expressions against injustice and demand accountability. Our unified voice needs to put pressure on our leaders to change our laws, or else we need to use our vote to create systemic change. Every one of us needs to be part of the solution, and we must work together to ensure justice for all.